Afraid to Tell

Why Am I Afraid to Tell You Who I Am? by John Powell, S.J. (Tabor Publishing, 1969, ISBN: 0-913592-02-1)

This book was written by:Father John Powell, S.J., retired professor of Theology at Loyola University and author of several introspective books designed to provide insights into the workings of the human mind, including Why Am I Afraid to Tell You Who I Am?, Why Am I Afraid to Love?, Will the Real Me Please Stand Up?, A Reason to Live! A Reason to Die!, and Abortion, the Silent Holocaust.

[UPDATE: You may be afraid to tell who you are if, like the author, you are an alleged sex abuser.]

What is in this book: 167 pages of text and images used to explain the answer that the book provides on page 12: “I am afraid to tell you who I am, because, if I tell you who I am, you may not like who I am, and it’s all that I have.” Father Powell examines some of the ways in which we avoid telling each other who we really are, noting that to truly communicate on an authentic level, it is not only necessary to share our judgments such as “I think you are intelligent,”(p.59), but also the emotional reactions accompanying those judgments (e.g., “...and I am jealous,” “...and it makes me ill at ease with you,” “...and I feel the desire to humiliate you.”[p.59]).

What is not in this book: Timidity or ambiguity. Father Powell himself communicates authentically without using overly formal or confusing language. For example, as he explains that in order to relate to one another on the most genuine level of communication we must report our emotions at the time they are being experienced, noting that:

All communication must obviously respect not only the transmitter of the communication but also the receiver who is to accept the communication. Consequently, it could occur that, in the integration of my emotions, my judgment may dictate that this is not the opportune moment to report my emotional reaction. If the receiver is so emotionally disturbed himself that he could hardly be in a receptive mood, and my report would only be distorted somehow by his turbulent emotional state, it may be that I will have to defer this report.(p.78)

Would you recommend this book to Christine McVie? Not really. She wants you to tell her lies. Sweet little lies.

Would you recommend this book to someone in the witness protection program? No, I think that they’re pretty clear on why they don’t want to tell you who they are.

What was interesting about this book? The final chapter’s “catalog of games and roles,” which is completely unlike anything produced by Parker Brothers or Gary Gygax. This catalog describes the roles played by the loner, the hedonist, the poor mouth, the pouter, and the flirt, as well as the reasons behind some of the games that they play to keep us from finding out who they really are. While Father Powell notes that “most girls who play the ‘Sex-Bomb’ game do not do so because they really enjoy genital sexuality or because they are ‘highly sexed.’ It is rather because they feel they have nothing else to offer but a provocative body,”(p.162) he neglects to mention that the Sex-Bomb game is only a game until someone loses an eye. Then it’s eroticism.

Get Ready to Make Money (I'm not talking to you)

EconAmerica: Why the American Economy Is Alive and Well ... And What that Means to Your Wallet by Jeff Thredgold (John Wiley & Sons, Inc., 2007, ISBN: 978-0-470-09698-7)

This book was written by: Jeff Thredgold, economic futurist and president of Thredgold Economic Associates. Mr. Thredgold is also humble, noting that “economists are wrong more often than we are right, for which we receive considerable and well-deserved abuse”(p.ix). This takes the some of the sting out of statements like his declarations that “Powerful gains in most home values, combined with stronger performance of the stock market in recent years, have given consumers a peace of mind that building ‘wealth’ for their future retirement or for the kids' college educations is working”(p.152) and that “Most forecasters expect overall [home] prices to move essentially sideways in 2007, with a return to rising home values in 2008 and 2009”(p.155).

What is in this book: Mr. Thredgold lists and discusses his four “silver bullets” that give him an optimistic view of the economy and his beliefs that “solid growth in 401(k) balances, more lucrative matching incentives by enlightened employers seeking to retrain skilled employees in an extremely tight labor market, and new programs enacted by the Congress to boost savings are in sight”(p.131).
The first bullet is the tight American labor market, because “an extremely tight American labor market in the coming years will boost real wages across the income spectrum”(p.29) and “Anemic growth in the American labor force over the next two decades in what is already a near-full employment economy will continue to enhance the real income gains of a majority of workers”(p.93).
The second bullet is that “politicians will be forced by the pressure of powerful financial markets and by constant media attention to set aside political rancor and work together to solve the entitlement funding and benefit issue”(p.58), which we can observe in the way that congress acted so swiftly—and so far in advance of widespread economic disaster—to pass the Emergency Economic Stabilization Act of 2008, noted for its almost immediate positive effects on the economy.
The third bullet is that confidence “will allow long-term interest rates to remain at low levels, benefiting both home buyers and others who seek funding in the credit markets”(p.79), and we know it “will continue as the nation’s bond market—the Fed’s overseer—will simply not allow any return of irresponsible Federal Reserve monetary policy”(p.79).
Finally, “the stock market should continue to do well in the coming years”(p.148).

What is not in this book: Partisan bickering. Mr. Thredgold takes the high road and avoids trying to place the blame for economic woes. “It is no secret that the majority of the national media has a strong liberal bias. As a result, Republican policy initiatives are typically cast in a negative light, while any good news relative to the economy is relegated to the back pages”(p.51).

Would you recommend this book to Mel Gibson? No. Mel Gibson has Air America, which had explosions, better drugs, and Robert Downey, Jr.

Would you recommend this book to a werewolf? Yes. It may help him (or her) find silver bullets to be much less terrifying.

What was interesting about this book? Mr. Thredgold’s list of guaranteed American growth industries, which are financial planning, leisure and entertainment, and healthcare. However, Mr. Thredgold warns that our healthcare industry needs tort reform, control of rising prescription drug prices, the ability for insurance providers to compete across state lines, and incentive-offering wellness programs. “We are moving unavoidably in the direction of a government-sponsored, nationalized health care system,” which Mr. Thredgold finds “scary” because “Placing government in direct control of another one-sixth of the American economy does not lend itself to rising consumer comfort levels. One has only to look at a struggling Canadian universal health care system to draw such a conclusion”(p.137) That’s right, Canada, he calls your healthcare system “extremely expensive, largely broken, and in need of resuscitation”(p.186). Oh, snap!

A Prescription for Conspiracy

Racketeering in Medicine: The Suppression of Alternatives by James P. Carter, M.D., Dr. P.H. (Hampton Roads Publishing, 1992, ISBN: 1-878901-32-X)

This book was written by: James P. Carter, M.D., Dr. P.H., who has served as the chairman of the national advisory committee of Meharry Medical College’s Kraft-General Foods Nutrition Center and as an editorial advisor to Prevention magazine.

What is in this book: Dr. Carter’s accusations that Organized Medicine, a “wide-ranging mosaic of special-interest groups who wield undue influence for maximizing profit and perpetuating the status quo in medical fields,” has “orchestrated financially-motivated cover-ups” for such nefarious purposes as “controlling the treatment of cancer”(p.xvii). For example, the practice of clinical ecology is ignored “simply because it does not abide by the strict definitions of scientific medicine, which confine diagnoses to that which can be scientifically explained”(p.64). Dr. Carter feels that “scientific proof of effectiveness is not always required—anecdotal evidence has been accepted as valid criteria”(p.7) for some therapies, like bypass surgery, so Organized Medicine is doing humanity a disservice by ignoring the medical breakthroughs that are being made daily in private hospitals, home laboratories, garages, toolsheds, bathroom stalls, and the back of a 1987 Ford Econoline van.

What is not in this book: Whitewashing. Dr. Carter makes no effort to spare us from the ugly truth, lifting the veil of goodwill used to cloak such monstrous abominations the American Cancer Society, the American Heart Association, and the American Lung Association. “Could it be that these charities are working on behalf of Organized Med on the higher up, administrative level? Some observers consider the major charities to be thinly-disguised lobbying fronts for Organized Med”(p.212). Dr. Carter also calls out the American Medical Association’s Coordinating Conference on Health Information, “a secretive, covert organization which operated with other similar groups, intertwining itself throughout a network with no public scrutiny”(p.14). And he brings to light the existence of a strike force that was formed “without the approval of congress and without the knowledge or the consent of the public,” although “it is a reasonable assumption that policy decisions were made by senior government officials in various agencies, and those policies were carried out through the covert actions of the strike force”(p.33).

Would you recommend this book to John McEnroe? Possibly, but this book is mostly about racketeering, and not much about racqueteering.

Would you recommend this book to Ecuadorean rapper and singer Girardo? No, Dr. Carter would like to see the corrupt organizations suppressing medical advancements brought to court under the RICO act. He is not interested in seeing the Rico (Suave) act.

What was interesting about this book? This is one of the few books with the courage to publicly defend the Church of Scientology and the good work it has been doing through its Citizens Commission on Human Rights, including its attempts to ban the prescription drug Prozac. Dr. Carter agrees with the statement that Scientologists are “earnest, enterprising, public-spirited and committed people,” and also with the statement that Scientologists “are sincere, dedicated human beings, who are striving hard for the betterment of all”(p.191). “Bravo to them,” says Dr. Carter, “for taking on legal drug merchants”(p.191).

Being Prepared: What Boy Scouts Wish They Knew

Preparing for Adolescence by Dr. James Dobson (Bantam Books, 1980, ISBN 0-553-24231-8)

This book was written by: Dr. James Dobson, chairman of the board of the nonprofit Focus on the Family organization and author of Dare to Discipline, which advocates corporal punishment for raising balanced, well-adjusted children. This book helps guide boys and girls through the challenges they will face at adolescence, after you have beaten them into responsible, well-adjusted children.

What is in this book: Advice from a hip cat who wants “to participate in a rap session”(p.109) with adolescents to let them know that they’re not alone in their troubles. Dr. Dobson establishes his street cred quickly, letting you know that if you use this book to help your children through their adolescence, "Knute Rockne would be proud of you!"(p.4), and showing how you and he feel the same pressures to conform to society's ideas of what it means to be current, like their suggestion that “nobody uses hair oil anymore, and if you use it as you did in the fifties and sixties, there must be something wrong with you”(p.36).
Dr. Dobson then uses his uncanny insights into the pressures faced by modern adolescents to sketch an accurate representation of their first encounter with drugs and peer pressure. It starts “in a car with four other young people,” where everyone starts taking “reds,” and “you are the last one to be handed the bottle”(p.37). If you give in to the taunting of your friends (“Come on, sissy [....] Who would have thought that Jackie-Boy was a big chicken! Come on, Baby Face”[p.37]), then “you’ll find that the next time drugs are offered, it’ll be a little easier to take them [.... and] soon you’ll be seriously hooked on narcotics, all because of the pressure of conformity”(p.38).
“Other harmful behaviors can also be traced to the pressure of conformity,” and Dr. Dobson traces these behaviors back to their source, usually beginning “by a ‘friend’ offering a weed to someone who has never smoked”(p.39). This book will give you the courage to stand up to any “friend” who tries to offer you a weed.

What is not in this book: Advice for children who are not normal, where normal is defined as heterosexual, Jesus-worshipping, and coming from a household with married parents and a stay-at-home mom. Worried that you can’t live up to this ideal? Don’t be. “Homosexuality is an abnormal desire that reflects deep problems, but it doesn’t happen very often, and it’s not likely to happen to you”(p.66).
Dr. Dobson also refuses to be hoodwinked by the mainstream media’s alternate explanations for drug and alcohol abuse. Kids are “tempted to take drugs or smoke or drink for the same reason you are—simply because they’re afraid to be different”(p.39), and anyone who tries to tell you that substance abuse can be caused by other factors like surviving sexual abuse, coping with parents getting divorced, having parents who beat them, dealing with being a closeted homosexual, and undiagnosed mental illnesses like chronic depression, schizophrenia, or bipolar disorder has clearly never been an adolescent.

Would you recommend this book to Jamie Lynn Spears? Maybe back when she was a Nick star, but these days, she’s a woman.

Would you recommend this book to John McCain? No, he should read "Preparing for Obsolescence." ZING!

What was interesting about this book: You will want to keep a bucket of ice water handy or be ready to take a cold shower when you encounter the steamy language he uses to start discussing “The Sex Appetite”(p.58) and how “you will be with a person of the opposite sex who will let you know that he or she will permit you to have this experience”(p.61). While colorful, this language is necessary and completely justified because “your body will begin to develop a brand new appetite when you’re between twelve and fifteen years old”(p.58). Adolescents will find that “every year as you get older, this appetite will become more and more a part of you,” and in the same way that missing breakfast will make you “plenty hungry by two o’clock in the afternoon,” this sex appetite will build within you until “this desire may lead you to marriage”(p.58).
Dr. Dobson also describes what it’s like to have a crush, which “occurs when you begin to think that one particular person is absolutely fantastic, and you fantasize about the possibility of being married to that person”(p.59), and explains that “I deal with so many Christian young people who are torn apart with guilt over masturbation; they want to stop and just can’t”(p.64).
Unfortunately, Dr. Dobson stops short in his discussions of the sex appetite by neglecting to mention issues such as sex anorexia, sex bulimia, and the dangers of death by sex starvation.

Award-Winning Excavations

Something More: Excavating Your Authentic Self by Sarah Ban Breathnach (Warner Books, 1998, ISBN: 0-446-52413-1)

This book was written by: Sarah Ban Breathnach, author of Simple Abundance and a woman who has a healthy, well-balanced attitude about men and her relationships with them. “I have always overwhelmed men,” she writes, “I used to think it was because I was lacking. Now I realize I’m the living embodiment of abundance – too much woman, too much love, too much passion”(p.163).

What is in this book: In this book, “You’re embarking on an archaeological dig to excavate your Authentic Self. Our journey has brought us to the sacred site of your soul. The choice of archaeology as our fantasy is very deliberate, because women are born incurable romantics”(p.20). Finding your authentic self “is not easy; if it were, everybody would be doing it,” but Ms. Ban Breathnach notes that “It’s been my observation that only women of great discernment, women with no time to lose or squander, and women who frequently feel too close to the edge for comfort, are the best candidates. Women very much like you and me”(p.8). At the end of each chapter are a set of questions, exercises for the reader assigned as field work. “As the archaeologist of your Self, it will be necessary for you to do some digging in the verdant field of your past, in order to aid the excavation process” (p.14).

What is not in this book: Advice for dudes. Some of the greatest luminaries in archaeology (Heinrich Schliemann, Howard Carter, Indiana Jones) may have been men, but this is a book for women—a fact you may recognize when Ban Breathnach discusses how the movie Bridges of Madison County was “a perfect example—not of passion, but of the habitual betrayal of our authenticity that leaves us lonely, vulnerable, and aching for anything other than a self-imposed sentence of life imprisonment”(p.147). It becomes even more evident when you read about how “You are sent into the Wilderness for one reason, and one reason only: Woman, find thyself”(p.177). Men shouldn’t read this book, and they certainly shouldn’t enjoy it, because “Men treat you badly when they don’t love you, but they treat you even worse when they don’t want to”(p.180, emphasis the author’s).

Would you recommend this book to Wonder Woman? Not really. I’d rather she spent her time reading books about the due process of law, and maybe brush up on some interrogation techniques in case her lasso of truth ever goes on the fritz. Lynda Carter might want to check this book out, though.

Would you recommend this book to a Sandhog? I... I can’t do it. I’m not going to use this space to make a crude, excavation-related double entendre about women and "heavy equipment." No matter how much I want to. I'm better than that.

What was interesting about this book? Sarah Ban Breathnach is a very spiritual writer. “Before making major decisions, I take my question to the spiritual world for consultation”(p.226). Creating the book itself appears to have been an almost religious experience, as she notes that “I laughed and cried as I wrote this book, just as women laugh and cry when we give birth. And I sense that this will be your experience as well”(p.14). Now that it has been completed, Ms. Ban Breathnach reflects on the process by admitting that “I trust the unseen more than the visible, which is why I have come to rely on the spiritual secret that ‘The Book’ always knows more than I do, thank God”(p.327).

Special Award
For the first time ever, Bitterly Books would like to present the WTF Award for Excellence in Literary Juxtaposition to Sarah Ban Breathnach for the following paragraph (p.78, emphasis the author’s):

One of the more horrific ways to die is through internal hemorrhaging, the uncontrollable bleeding buried in the body’s cavity. What makes this particular exit route even more insidious is that internal hemorrhaging is most often painless to the victim. There are no visible clues signaling the tiny trickle that starts when a small blood vessel begins to leak until it’s become a fatal flood, “a blood-stemmed tide,” as the Irish poet W. B. Yeats so beautifully describes destiny.

In his original poem "The Second Coming," Yeats writes of a "blood-dimmed tide." Because of her bold re-interpretation of the poet's original language and her daring linkage of Irish poetry, destiny, and death by internal bleeding, it is with great pride that Bitterly Books announces Sarah Ban Breathnach as the first ever recipient of the WTF Award for Excellence in Literary Juxtaposition. Ms. Ban Breathnach, you’ve earned it.

Trust Me: This Book Is Useful

Never Be Lied to Again: How to get the truth in 5 minutes or less in any conversation or situation by David J. Lieberman, PhD (St. Martin’s Press, 1998, ISBN: 0-312-18634-7)

This book was written by: Dr. David J. Lieberman, who is “affectionately referred to as a hired gun,”(p.2) and singularly adept at marketing this book to the intensely paranoid. “When you know a person’s true intent, you have the power to control the situation,”(p.1) writes Lieberman, who also says that one of his clients described his techniques as “like having a man inside their camp—an outpost in their head” (p.1).

What is in this book: Ways that people will lie to you, and ways that you can see through their lies to draw the truth from them. You may not have known that “the person who is lying will probably slouch […] he may place physical objects between himself and his accuser”(p.26), and that other common signals to look for include poor posture(p.23), being uncomfortable with silence (p.31), not giving a direct answer (p.32), or an obsession with establishing a contrary position—e.g., “the man who claims to be adamantly against prostitution may be covering up his true feelings, which are the exact opposite”(p.36). Dr. Lieberman also directs readers to look for a lack of eye contact (p.13), mumbling, (p.24) and “take note if he is trying to control his breathing to calm himself”(p.54). This, along with the warning to “look for signs of distraction and an inability to pay attention to what’s going on”(p.55) definitively prove that people who claim to have ADD, social anxiety, or asthma are just filthy liars.

What is not in this book: A blueprint for torture (wink, wink). Dr. Lieberman’s methods to get at the truth include eleven “attack sequences” followed by eleven “silver bullets.” “If terms like arsenal, weapons, and bullets seem warlike, it’s understandable. But they’re thoroughly appropriate considering the situation [….] You need to see the process of detecting deceit for what it really is—a verbal battle”(p.67). In his opening note to readers, Dr. Lieberman cautions that his techniques could be used for ill, but “to live in a world where information is distributed based upon the damage that can be caused by the lowest common denominator is to spiral away from progress and away from hope”(p.xiii). He also warns that some of his techniques, especially the one called Heaven and Hell, “should be used as a last resort. It is with high hope and expectation that this and all of the other processes be practiced with judgment, common sense, and decency”(p.165). Of course, “if you want to influence a person’s behavior, you need to attach pain to the direction you don’t want him to move in”(p.180).

Would you recommend this book to Scarlett O’Hara? Yes, if only so she could dramatically shake her fist at the sky and scream, “As God is my witness, I will never be lied to again!”

Would you recommend this book to Maury Povich? No, if the information in this book became common knowledge, his pool of guests would shrink dramatically, so he'd probably try to have all copies of this book destroyed.

What was interesting about this book? Dr. Lieberman’s hypothetical situations for using his techniques in romantic relationships. He addresses the obvious questions of whether your partner really loves you, but also sketches a scene where Pamela discovers that “she has contracted the herpes virus”(p.95). Because she is familiar with the techniques in this book, “she calls both guys up and casually informs them that she just found out that she has herpes. The responses she got led her straight to the culprit”(p.96). He also discusses a situation where “during their first intimate encounter, Randy asks his new girlfriend if she’s ever been tested for AIDS. [….] If she was concerned about her health, as her answer implied, then she would have asked him the same question”(p.44).