A Prescription for Conspiracy

Racketeering in Medicine: The Suppression of Alternatives by James P. Carter, M.D., Dr. P.H. (Hampton Roads Publishing, 1992, ISBN: 1-878901-32-X)

This book was written by: James P. Carter, M.D., Dr. P.H., who has served as the chairman of the national advisory committee of Meharry Medical College’s Kraft-General Foods Nutrition Center and as an editorial advisor to Prevention magazine.

What is in this book: Dr. Carter’s accusations that Organized Medicine, a “wide-ranging mosaic of special-interest groups who wield undue influence for maximizing profit and perpetuating the status quo in medical fields,” has “orchestrated financially-motivated cover-ups” for such nefarious purposes as “controlling the treatment of cancer”(p.xvii). For example, the practice of clinical ecology is ignored “simply because it does not abide by the strict definitions of scientific medicine, which confine diagnoses to that which can be scientifically explained”(p.64). Dr. Carter feels that “scientific proof of effectiveness is not always required—anecdotal evidence has been accepted as valid criteria”(p.7) for some therapies, like bypass surgery, so Organized Medicine is doing humanity a disservice by ignoring the medical breakthroughs that are being made daily in private hospitals, home laboratories, garages, toolsheds, bathroom stalls, and the back of a 1987 Ford Econoline van.

What is not in this book: Whitewashing. Dr. Carter makes no effort to spare us from the ugly truth, lifting the veil of goodwill used to cloak such monstrous abominations the American Cancer Society, the American Heart Association, and the American Lung Association. “Could it be that these charities are working on behalf of Organized Med on the higher up, administrative level? Some observers consider the major charities to be thinly-disguised lobbying fronts for Organized Med”(p.212). Dr. Carter also calls out the American Medical Association’s Coordinating Conference on Health Information, “a secretive, covert organization which operated with other similar groups, intertwining itself throughout a network with no public scrutiny”(p.14). And he brings to light the existence of a strike force that was formed “without the approval of congress and without the knowledge or the consent of the public,” although “it is a reasonable assumption that policy decisions were made by senior government officials in various agencies, and those policies were carried out through the covert actions of the strike force”(p.33).

Would you recommend this book to John McEnroe? Possibly, but this book is mostly about racketeering, and not much about racqueteering.

Would you recommend this book to Ecuadorean rapper and singer Girardo? No, Dr. Carter would like to see the corrupt organizations suppressing medical advancements brought to court under the RICO act. He is not interested in seeing the Rico (Suave) act.

What was interesting about this book? This is one of the few books with the courage to publicly defend the Church of Scientology and the good work it has been doing through its Citizens Commission on Human Rights, including its attempts to ban the prescription drug Prozac. Dr. Carter agrees with the statement that Scientologists are “earnest, enterprising, public-spirited and committed people,” and also with the statement that Scientologists “are sincere, dedicated human beings, who are striving hard for the betterment of all”(p.191). “Bravo to them,” says Dr. Carter, “for taking on legal drug merchants”(p.191).

Being Prepared: What Boy Scouts Wish They Knew

Preparing for Adolescence by Dr. James Dobson (Bantam Books, 1980, ISBN 0-553-24231-8)

This book was written by: Dr. James Dobson, chairman of the board of the nonprofit Focus on the Family organization and author of Dare to Discipline, which advocates corporal punishment for raising balanced, well-adjusted children. This book helps guide boys and girls through the challenges they will face at adolescence, after you have beaten them into responsible, well-adjusted children.

What is in this book: Advice from a hip cat who wants “to participate in a rap session”(p.109) with adolescents to let them know that they’re not alone in their troubles. Dr. Dobson establishes his street cred quickly, letting you know that if you use this book to help your children through their adolescence, "Knute Rockne would be proud of you!"(p.4), and showing how you and he feel the same pressures to conform to society's ideas of what it means to be current, like their suggestion that “nobody uses hair oil anymore, and if you use it as you did in the fifties and sixties, there must be something wrong with you”(p.36).
Dr. Dobson then uses his uncanny insights into the pressures faced by modern adolescents to sketch an accurate representation of their first encounter with drugs and peer pressure. It starts “in a car with four other young people,” where everyone starts taking “reds,” and “you are the last one to be handed the bottle”(p.37). If you give in to the taunting of your friends (“Come on, sissy [....] Who would have thought that Jackie-Boy was a big chicken! Come on, Baby Face”[p.37]), then “you’ll find that the next time drugs are offered, it’ll be a little easier to take them [.... and] soon you’ll be seriously hooked on narcotics, all because of the pressure of conformity”(p.38).
“Other harmful behaviors can also be traced to the pressure of conformity,” and Dr. Dobson traces these behaviors back to their source, usually beginning “by a ‘friend’ offering a weed to someone who has never smoked”(p.39). This book will give you the courage to stand up to any “friend” who tries to offer you a weed.

What is not in this book: Advice for children who are not normal, where normal is defined as heterosexual, Jesus-worshipping, and coming from a household with married parents and a stay-at-home mom. Worried that you can’t live up to this ideal? Don’t be. “Homosexuality is an abnormal desire that reflects deep problems, but it doesn’t happen very often, and it’s not likely to happen to you”(p.66).
Dr. Dobson also refuses to be hoodwinked by the mainstream media’s alternate explanations for drug and alcohol abuse. Kids are “tempted to take drugs or smoke or drink for the same reason you are—simply because they’re afraid to be different”(p.39), and anyone who tries to tell you that substance abuse can be caused by other factors like surviving sexual abuse, coping with parents getting divorced, having parents who beat them, dealing with being a closeted homosexual, and undiagnosed mental illnesses like chronic depression, schizophrenia, or bipolar disorder has clearly never been an adolescent.

Would you recommend this book to Jamie Lynn Spears? Maybe back when she was a Nick star, but these days, she’s a woman.

Would you recommend this book to John McCain? No, he should read "Preparing for Obsolescence." ZING!

What was interesting about this book: You will want to keep a bucket of ice water handy or be ready to take a cold shower when you encounter the steamy language he uses to start discussing “The Sex Appetite”(p.58) and how “you will be with a person of the opposite sex who will let you know that he or she will permit you to have this experience”(p.61). While colorful, this language is necessary and completely justified because “your body will begin to develop a brand new appetite when you’re between twelve and fifteen years old”(p.58). Adolescents will find that “every year as you get older, this appetite will become more and more a part of you,” and in the same way that missing breakfast will make you “plenty hungry by two o’clock in the afternoon,” this sex appetite will build within you until “this desire may lead you to marriage”(p.58).
Dr. Dobson also describes what it’s like to have a crush, which “occurs when you begin to think that one particular person is absolutely fantastic, and you fantasize about the possibility of being married to that person”(p.59), and explains that “I deal with so many Christian young people who are torn apart with guilt over masturbation; they want to stop and just can’t”(p.64).
Unfortunately, Dr. Dobson stops short in his discussions of the sex appetite by neglecting to mention issues such as sex anorexia, sex bulimia, and the dangers of death by sex starvation.

Award-Winning Excavations

Something More: Excavating Your Authentic Self by Sarah Ban Breathnach (Warner Books, 1998, ISBN: 0-446-52413-1)

This book was written by: Sarah Ban Breathnach, author of Simple Abundance and a woman who has a healthy, well-balanced attitude about men and her relationships with them. “I have always overwhelmed men,” she writes, “I used to think it was because I was lacking. Now I realize I’m the living embodiment of abundance – too much woman, too much love, too much passion”(p.163).

What is in this book: In this book, “You’re embarking on an archaeological dig to excavate your Authentic Self. Our journey has brought us to the sacred site of your soul. The choice of archaeology as our fantasy is very deliberate, because women are born incurable romantics”(p.20). Finding your authentic self “is not easy; if it were, everybody would be doing it,” but Ms. Ban Breathnach notes that “It’s been my observation that only women of great discernment, women with no time to lose or squander, and women who frequently feel too close to the edge for comfort, are the best candidates. Women very much like you and me”(p.8). At the end of each chapter are a set of questions, exercises for the reader assigned as field work. “As the archaeologist of your Self, it will be necessary for you to do some digging in the verdant field of your past, in order to aid the excavation process” (p.14).

What is not in this book: Advice for dudes. Some of the greatest luminaries in archaeology (Heinrich Schliemann, Howard Carter, Indiana Jones) may have been men, but this is a book for women—a fact you may recognize when Ban Breathnach discusses how the movie Bridges of Madison County was “a perfect example—not of passion, but of the habitual betrayal of our authenticity that leaves us lonely, vulnerable, and aching for anything other than a self-imposed sentence of life imprisonment”(p.147). It becomes even more evident when you read about how “You are sent into the Wilderness for one reason, and one reason only: Woman, find thyself”(p.177). Men shouldn’t read this book, and they certainly shouldn’t enjoy it, because “Men treat you badly when they don’t love you, but they treat you even worse when they don’t want to”(p.180, emphasis the author’s).

Would you recommend this book to Wonder Woman? Not really. I’d rather she spent her time reading books about the due process of law, and maybe brush up on some interrogation techniques in case her lasso of truth ever goes on the fritz. Lynda Carter might want to check this book out, though.

Would you recommend this book to a Sandhog? I... I can’t do it. I’m not going to use this space to make a crude, excavation-related double entendre about women and "heavy equipment." No matter how much I want to. I'm better than that.

What was interesting about this book? Sarah Ban Breathnach is a very spiritual writer. “Before making major decisions, I take my question to the spiritual world for consultation”(p.226). Creating the book itself appears to have been an almost religious experience, as she notes that “I laughed and cried as I wrote this book, just as women laugh and cry when we give birth. And I sense that this will be your experience as well”(p.14). Now that it has been completed, Ms. Ban Breathnach reflects on the process by admitting that “I trust the unseen more than the visible, which is why I have come to rely on the spiritual secret that ‘The Book’ always knows more than I do, thank God”(p.327).

Special Award
For the first time ever, Bitterly Books would like to present the WTF Award for Excellence in Literary Juxtaposition to Sarah Ban Breathnach for the following paragraph (p.78, emphasis the author’s):

One of the more horrific ways to die is through internal hemorrhaging, the uncontrollable bleeding buried in the body’s cavity. What makes this particular exit route even more insidious is that internal hemorrhaging is most often painless to the victim. There are no visible clues signaling the tiny trickle that starts when a small blood vessel begins to leak until it’s become a fatal flood, “a blood-stemmed tide,” as the Irish poet W. B. Yeats so beautifully describes destiny.

In his original poem "The Second Coming," Yeats writes of a "blood-dimmed tide." Because of her bold re-interpretation of the poet's original language and her daring linkage of Irish poetry, destiny, and death by internal bleeding, it is with great pride that Bitterly Books announces Sarah Ban Breathnach as the first ever recipient of the WTF Award for Excellence in Literary Juxtaposition. Ms. Ban Breathnach, you’ve earned it.

Trust Me: This Book Is Useful

Never Be Lied to Again: How to get the truth in 5 minutes or less in any conversation or situation by David J. Lieberman, PhD (St. Martin’s Press, 1998, ISBN: 0-312-18634-7)

This book was written by: Dr. David J. Lieberman, who is “affectionately referred to as a hired gun,”(p.2) and singularly adept at marketing this book to the intensely paranoid. “When you know a person’s true intent, you have the power to control the situation,”(p.1) writes Lieberman, who also says that one of his clients described his techniques as “like having a man inside their camp—an outpost in their head” (p.1).

What is in this book: Ways that people will lie to you, and ways that you can see through their lies to draw the truth from them. You may not have known that “the person who is lying will probably slouch […] he may place physical objects between himself and his accuser”(p.26), and that other common signals to look for include poor posture(p.23), being uncomfortable with silence (p.31), not giving a direct answer (p.32), or an obsession with establishing a contrary position—e.g., “the man who claims to be adamantly against prostitution may be covering up his true feelings, which are the exact opposite”(p.36). Dr. Lieberman also directs readers to look for a lack of eye contact (p.13), mumbling, (p.24) and “take note if he is trying to control his breathing to calm himself”(p.54). This, along with the warning to “look for signs of distraction and an inability to pay attention to what’s going on”(p.55) definitively prove that people who claim to have ADD, social anxiety, or asthma are just filthy liars.

What is not in this book: A blueprint for torture (wink, wink). Dr. Lieberman’s methods to get at the truth include eleven “attack sequences” followed by eleven “silver bullets.” “If terms like arsenal, weapons, and bullets seem warlike, it’s understandable. But they’re thoroughly appropriate considering the situation [….] You need to see the process of detecting deceit for what it really is—a verbal battle”(p.67). In his opening note to readers, Dr. Lieberman cautions that his techniques could be used for ill, but “to live in a world where information is distributed based upon the damage that can be caused by the lowest common denominator is to spiral away from progress and away from hope”(p.xiii). He also warns that some of his techniques, especially the one called Heaven and Hell, “should be used as a last resort. It is with high hope and expectation that this and all of the other processes be practiced with judgment, common sense, and decency”(p.165). Of course, “if you want to influence a person’s behavior, you need to attach pain to the direction you don’t want him to move in”(p.180).

Would you recommend this book to Scarlett O’Hara? Yes, if only so she could dramatically shake her fist at the sky and scream, “As God is my witness, I will never be lied to again!”

Would you recommend this book to Maury Povich? No, if the information in this book became common knowledge, his pool of guests would shrink dramatically, so he'd probably try to have all copies of this book destroyed.

What was interesting about this book? Dr. Lieberman’s hypothetical situations for using his techniques in romantic relationships. He addresses the obvious questions of whether your partner really loves you, but also sketches a scene where Pamela discovers that “she has contracted the herpes virus”(p.95). Because she is familiar with the techniques in this book, “she calls both guys up and casually informs them that she just found out that she has herpes. The responses she got led her straight to the culprit”(p.96). He also discusses a situation where “during their first intimate encounter, Randy asks his new girlfriend if she’s ever been tested for AIDS. [….] If she was concerned about her health, as her answer implied, then she would have asked him the same question”(p.44).

Answer: Certainly Nothing Suspicious

What Is the Church Doing? by Henry P. Van Dusen (Charles Scribner’s Sons, 1943)

This book was written by: Henry Pitney Van Dusen, who served as trustee of a dozen institutions (including the Rockefeller Foundation, Vassar, Smith, and Princeton), appeared on the cover of TIME Magazine, and committed suicide by overdose of sleeping pills in 1975.

What is in this book: A chronicle of the church’s efforts to stand against the sweeping menace of the Third Reich. 1943 may have been dark times for Christians, but Van Dusen assures us that throughout history, “the Christian Movement has swept in ever wider circles and penetrated with ever deeper influence” (p.137). In fact, “An undeniable adjunct of Christian extension in each of its four most creative periods has been political conquest or penetration [….] almost always political penetration has in some measure prepared a setting for the Church’s evangelistic work”(p.145). The Church's political penetration, which allows its members to stand erect in the face of der Führer, will bring Fascism to its knees. Thanks to the Church's thorough penetration, “the forward movement, when again resumed, will carry the name and power of Christ farther and deeper than at any earlier time” (p.155).

What is not in this book: Pointless divisiveness. Despite the times, Christian churches across the globe are on a course which might lead “to the ultimate reunion of all principal Christian bodies outside the Church of Rome,” (p.96) and this book describes gatherings where the “congregations are truly ecumenical. All Christian denominations, except the Roman Catholic Church, and thirty different nationalities are here represented”(p.113). Even in the face of terror and oppression on a global scale, Christians of “every major Communion (except the Church of Rome) have been coming increasingly to think of their Churches as members of a World Community”(p.55).

Would you recommend this book to the digital underground? No, in spite of what you may have heard to the contrary, the Church is not interested in doin’ the humpty dance, no matter how urgently Humpty Hump repeats his entreaties.

Would you recommend this book to that guy who played “Lowell” on Wings? No, fans who want to keep abreast of what “the Church” is doing should keep an eye on the latest copy of People.

What was interesting about this book? A surprisingly keen insight into the way that the average man on the street thinks when considering what is the Church doing. “Not infrequently it is asked with a shrug of the shoulders and a slightly altered inflection which suggests its own answer, ‘What is the Church doing?’”(p.3). As true today as when it was written.

Surviving Families

Families and How to Survive Them by Robin Skynner and John Cleese (Oxford University Press, 1984, ISBN: 0-19-520466-2)

This book was written by: Psychiatrist Robin Skynner and one of his former patients, John Cleese. They collaborated on the book because most people have “neither the need, the time nor the inclination to bother with therapy itself,”(p.10) but Cleese notes that “even if these ideas are only one-hundredth as intriguing to you as they were to me, I shall still get the royalties”(p.11).

What is in this book: A transcription of the two authors (Skynner and Cleese) discussing behavioral and relationship difficulties experienced by families. The “script” format was the clear choice because the best medium for exploring the delicate nuances present in the full range of human emotion is obviously a 285-page dialogue between two Englishmen.
The authors assert that most family issues stem from the fact that people seek out partners who have similar personalities developed through similar upbringings. “We signal, by our expressions, postures, and ways of moving, certain habitual emotional attitudes we have, which we share with other members of our family. And people from similar families will pick them up and respond to them”(p.22), which will cause problems because “All those people who used to get married – and still do – to escape from their families are in some way taking their families with them, psychologically speaking”(p.16). You may not marry your mother, but you will seek out and marry the sister you never had.
After establishing this premise, they continue on to discuss relationships between family members on every level, breaking down problems and their solutions by using helpful metaphors--such as their explanation of sexual dysfunction as a situation where “the man is like the driver of a car who has taken his hands off the steering wheel and climbed into the back seat – the car being his penis and the steering wheel being his connection with it”(p.289).

What is not in this book: The dead parrot sketch. A heartfelt plea not to beat your children. Cleese writes that when his daughter “was about four, she was getting very, very difficult and I finally lost my temper and I smacked her hard for the first time. And to my absolute amazement I could sense that our relationship immediately got better. I had to smack her again sometimes, but the intervals between the smackings were getting longer and longer. So that after she was six, I hardly ever had to do it”(p.184).

Would you recommend this book to Andrew Dice Clay? Probably not. The subject matter would be unlikely to interest him, and he may take issue with Cleese’s claim that “I have heard several hundred thousand dirty jokes in my life, and only seven of them were funny”(p.236).

Would you recommend this book to that guy who won't stop quoting Monty Python lines (especially the ones from the Knights of Ni)? No. While that guy could definitely benefit from some quality time with a psychiatrist and/or psychotherapist, having him read this book would be like giving an antacid to someone with the Ebola virus.

What was interesting about this book: While Robin Skynner (1922–2000) went on to become physician in charge of the Department of Psychiatry at Queen Elizabeth Hospital for Children as well as founder and first chairman of the Institute of Family Therapy before his death, his co-author has found employment as a motivational speaker who notes that the transitional object bringing comfort and support to his infancy “was a stuffed rabbit called Reggie”(p.143).