Book Review: Six-Figure Salaries Are the New Black

Secrets of Six-Figure Women by Barbara Stanny (HarperBusiness, 2002, ISBN 0-06-093346-1)

This book was written by: Barbara Stanny, a journalist, motivational speaker, and financial educator who is uniquely qualified to tell the world about women who have fought their way up through the glass ceiling to earn six-figure salaries. "Raised in a wealthy family," she writes, "married to a stockbroker, given a trust fund when I turned twenty-one, I never gave money a lot of thought. I always worked hard but never earned much, and it didn't matter" (p.48).

What is in this book: Plenty of lists, like the 8 secrets of six-figure women(p.42), their 4 must-haves (p.78), their 3 big helpers (p.79), and the nine traits of underearning (p. 52). Ms. Stanny has provided these lists along with anecdotes from and discussions with her six-figure friends to show how "underearners unwittingly throw banana peels in their own path in all sorts of ways, like applying for work they're not qualified for,"(p.61) when they actually need to exhibit more audacity, since every six-figure woman she interviewed "came to a point where she had to step outside her comfort zone and do something she wasn't completely sure she could do" (p.79).

What is not in this book: A call for women to sit down and be quiet. While "women don't understand power," (p.237) Stanny feels that "a woman afraid of her power is like an eagle afraid of its wings" (p.235). "I truly believe that when enough women claim their power, collectively we'll have the resources, values, vision, and sensitivity to change the world, to heal the planet" (p. 254).

Would you recommend this book to a professional wrestler? No, I would recommend that a professional wrestler try to convince Ric Flair to write Secrets of the Figure Four Leg Lock, because I would totally read the hell out of that book.

Would you recommend this book to Calista Flockhart? Yes, but she'd probably only read it if she thought it was about the secrets of stick figure women.

What was interesting about this book? Stanny writes that her assistant, "Juliette, doubled her salary soon after she picked up my book" (p. xvi). Happily, I was also able to double my yearly earnings almost immediately after reading this book; I was able to claim the recycling deposit on some cans I found in my living room car.

Book Review: I'll love "Is"

The Isle of Is: A Guide to Awakening by Caroline Cottom and Thom Cronkhite (The Center Within, 2006, ISBN 978-982-98004-1-1)

This book was written by: Thom Cronkhite, who is a "medical intuitive and vibrational energy healer. [....] Apparently born "awakened," he experiences life as constant joy and peace, fully in the present"(p.189). His co-author, Caroline Cottom is the "published author of numerous articles, essays, short stories, and poetry,"(p.190). This book will no doubt be of interest to all of the readers that have been avidly tracking her career since her time spent as former director of the Nuclear Weapons Freeze Campaign and the U.S. Comprehensive Test Ban Coalition made her a household name.

What is in this book: A heaping pile of metaphor, fat stacks of allegory, and dripping puddles of symbolism. This book seeks to take "wisdom that humans have known about for a very long time," (p.9) and to present in the story of a journey that will assist the reader in "uncovering that state of being where peace and joy already exist, throughout time and space" (p.10). The journey involves a boat, a swamp, a mountain, and some talking gnomes.
This book also contains a series of writing exercises. The narrator is given a pen (which "shall be your Wand") and an inkwell (signifying "The Well, which is the silence within") on page 16. The reader is instructed to "take the Wand" or "go to the Well" at various times to answer questions like:

"What is one thing in your life that you can't imagine being grateful for?" (p.35)
"What distractions do I use when I don't wish to feel my feelings. And what feelings am I hoping not to feel?" (p.106)
"What stories, songs, fairytales, or movies did you resonate with as a young person?" (p.127)

Since these tools have been given to the reader metaphorically, the writing exercises can also be done metaphorically, which saves a lot of time. (However, for those keeping score at home, the correct answers in no particular order are: gout, arson/jealousy, and Hudson Hawk.)

What is not in this book? Conceit. "The narrator refers to him or herself as "we" because the word "I" solidifies the ego, whereas the word "we" removes us from the egoic bond"(p.181). It is a bold move that could have alienated the reader and ended up sounding like a schizophrenic quoting Faulkner on a bad day, but has been completely vindicated by passages like "We are wearing the captain's hat, and Is-is sits on our shoulder!" (p.176).

Would you recommend this book to Steven Seagal? Yes, he can use a break from the isle of has-been.

Would you recommend this book to Pathmark customers? No. They already know that to "Go fresh, go local," they should search the aisles, not the isles.

What was interesting about this book? The book comes with an audio version on CD, which is perfect for people who want to awaken themselves so that they can live in a place where they no longer value their material possessions and the crude distractions of popular entertainment.

Book Review: Don't Say Stress

The 14 Day Stress Cure: A New Approach for Dealing with Stress that Can Change Your Life by Mort Orman, MD (Breakthru Publishing, 1991, ISBN 0-942540-06-9)

This book was written by: Morton C. Orman, M.D., an internist who has completed a two-year post-doctoral training program in Contextual Therapy.

What is in this book: Stress management from a biolinguistic perspective. This book talks about stress stemming from "a false understanding of ourselves as human beings, which arises from inaccurate mind-body theories that are no longer accepted by twentieth century thinkers"(p.36). That is because "according to Biolinguistics, human beings do not consist of "a mind and a body,"" and "the basic error of all mind-body thoeries is that they assume a separate "mental" domain inside human beings which doesn't really exist" (p.38). Dr. Orman's book is timely because "while a growing number of scholars, scientists, psychotherapists, and other health professionals have recently embraced this biolinguistic perspective, most stress experts today are completely unaware of its existence" (p.xvii).

What is not in this book: A detailed explanation of biolinguistics, since "an in-depth discussion of biolinguistics is beyond the scope of this book"(p.39). Furthermore, "even though this book is titled The 14 Day Stress Cure, it is not a "quick-fix" remedy for the problem of human stress" (p.xix).

Would you recommend this book to Daniel Day-Lewis, Dennis Day, Doris Day, Frances Day, Francis Day, Graham Day, Hap Day, Howie Day, Laraine Day, Robin Day, Ryan Day, Sandra Day O'Connor, Stockwell Day, and William R. Day? Even if we could warp the very fabric of space and time to bring all 14 of them together in one place, I don't think that they'd be interested in collectively developing their own cure for stress as a counterproposal.

Would you recommend this book to the attorney general of the United States? Yes. It is essential that we stay current with the latest stress-management techniques, so that our stress positions are able to counter them. Otherwise, the terrorists have won.

What was interesting about this book? People who suffer from stress are likely to feel trapped in an endless cycle of torment despite their best stress-management efforts. After all, "Challenging your internal conversations is similar to playing the Space Invaders video game. [...] No matter how many times you destroy these relentless invaders, they keep reappearing"(p.107). Dr. Orman has successfully re-framed the conflict with stress in a way that will soothe the fears of these individuals while using terms that are easy for them to understand. "This book is about winning against stress"(p.v). Also, "when you know how to use the coping method outlined in this book, you not only "win" by getting rid of your stress, but you also "win" by improving your mastery and competence in life as well"(p.xv). Furthermore, "every time you choose this road you become a double winner in your fight against stress"(p.256). So if you can't use the coping method outlined in this book, then you are clearly a loser.

Book Review: Stop Drinking Water

Water Can Undermine Your Health! by Norman W. Walker, Doctor of Science (1974, Norwalk Press, ISBN 8-89019-037-2)

This book was written by: Dr. Norman Walker, Doctor of Science, whose healthy lifestyle has kept him alive to the ages of 113, 118 , 120, and even 130, despite claims to the contrary made by some site that's a big fan of invasive popups. Alleged "evidence" of his death at age 99, citing the U.S. Social Security Death Index and a grave marker, is inconclusive at best.

What is in this book: Things you didn't know about the fluids you put in your mouth, like "what EVIL lurks in a keg of BEER" (p.33) and "the deadly CHLORINE" (p.59). Dr. Walker couches his sound, scientific advice in clear, no-nonsense terms, like his warning that "Sea Water is not, under any circumstances, intended to be used for drinking purposes," (p.41) although you can use it for drinking purposes "in fractional amounts, at the rate of 4 to 8 drops of ocean water to the glass or pint of whatever beverage you plan to drink" (p.41).

What is not in this book: An incitement to cannibalism. While Dr. Walker states that "Malnutrition results from feeding the body food which has been heated or processed to such a degree that the life of the atoms and molecules composing such food is extinct,"(p.vii) and that "dead atoms and dead molecules cannot rejuvenate nor regenerate the cells in the body,"(p.vii) he does not advocate tearing into the living flesh of your enemies. Instead, he suggests eating "live" vegetables, like some kind of sissy.

Would you recommend this book to Jenna Jameson? No. Ms. Jameson does not seem to be overly concerned with the issue of purity.

Would you recommend this book to Brigadier General Jack D. Ripper? No. While I am profoundly convinced that Dr. Walker and General Ripper speak the same language, Dr. Walker advocates the drinking of neither rainwater nor grain alcohol.

What was interesting about this book? Dr. Walker is also the inventor of the Norwalk Juicer. His publisher has written a eulogy for him that has been published in series of 7 posts on the Norwalk Juicing Community Forum.

Book Review: Nothing Happened

The Big Bang Never Happened by Eric J. Lerner (Vintage Books, 1992, ISBN 0-679-74049-X)

This book was written by: Eric J. Lerner, who holds a BA in physics from Columbia University. He is also an avid wikipedia editor, although he is no longer allowed to make changes to his own biography.

What is in this book: Similes, metaphors, and other comparative devices used to associate the present day with the fall of the Roman empire, the dark ages just before the Renaissance, and even Germany's Weimar republic (read: Hitler). This is because "there can be no doubt that the development and advance of global society has halted, that the current dominant society, capitalist society, has reached its ultimate limits," (p.413) held back by the repressive tyranny of the Big Bang Theory. We may take heart, though, because "quietly, without much fanfare, a new revolution is beginning which is likely to overthrow many of the dominant ideas of today's science" (p3). These sentiments are as true today as they were when originally written in 1991.
While Mr. Lerner has “personally contributed to the development of plasma cosmology, this book is overwhelmingly about the work and ideas of others” (p.vii). His book describes the infinitely old universe theory "to explain these new ideas to the general reader, one who is interested in the crucial issues of science but who has no special training in the subject" (p.5).

What is not in this book: Large Italian men in tailored suits and too much cologne who tell you that "You didn't see any Big Bang, capisce?," but it should be noted that Mr. Lerner's offices are in New Jersey.

Would you recommend this book to Dr. Bunsen Honeydew? I can tell you that Dr. Honeydew is much more interested in string theory.

Would you recommend this book to Vice President Dick Cheney? Actually, I'd recommend that the author study Cheney to learn more about using coercion, intimidation, threats, and "disappearances" to convince people that specific events never happened, because all of those methods are more effective than publishing a book.

What was interesting about this book? Edward L. Wright has taken exception to the theories advanced in this book, and published what he perceived to be a list of errors. Mr. Lerner's response escalated the matter into the kind of full-scale catfight showing all the heated passions and colorful language one would expect of two people passive-aggressively posting open letters and never directly addressing one another.

Book Review: Creating (Non-Fatal) Attraction(s)

Creation through Attraction: A Six Step Process to Manifestation Using The Power Of Your Feelings. by Lea Pharoah, D.C. (Lea Pharoah, 1996, ISBN 0-9586538-0-1)

This book was written by: Lea Pharoah, a twice-divorced chiropractor who wrote the manuscript in "an intense period of four weeks" (p.66)

What is in this book: Lea's six-step process for manifesting changes in your life. While it is accompanied by personal stories for inspiriation, it is "not a book to be read as a novel" (p.70). The personal stories are also not to be considered as filler to pad out the length of the work. One can consider the frequent section breaks and large amounts of white space on each page as filler to pad out the length of the book.

What is not in this book: A dismissal of subjects considered as beneath one's concern; nothing is too small to justify being fixed by affirmations and attractions. For example, one can use the following affirmation to attract better carpets:
"I am thrilled with my ability to attract warm floor coverings into my home, for the good of all concerned." (p.60)

Would you recommend this book to fans of Hannah Montana? No, any competent OB/GYN will tell you that high school students already know too much about how mutual attraction can lead to creation. Also, the last thing we need is creepy old perverts finding more successful ways to attract underage girls into their secret torture pens.

Would you recommend this book to man with a stainless steel hook for a hand? This book won't help him grow another hand, if that's what you're asking. However, it does stand a chance of convincing him that losing his hand was something that was supposed to happen to him, and that he just needs to realize that he is better off without it so that good things start happening to him again.

What was interesting about this book? It originally ended on page 91, announcing that the author "had finally achieved the relationship of my dreams, this referring to my second husband, Stevan" (p.92). However, in the eighteen months after the original completion of the manuscript, an additional four pages were written and inserted into the book, numbered 92 through 95. In them the author states that while that dream relationship has ended in divorce, it was because her parents had given her an unhappy childhood, but she has chosen to "move out of the state of being a victim to our circumstances into a new state of control and re-creation of our present and our future"(p.94-95).